Opinion  

Mrs Ambitious writes me a letter full of expectations, concerning her son, Notso. He is, she says, failing to achieve his potential for greatness and something must be done Clearly her expectations are fuelled by her hopes. Could I please drag Notso into the surgery on entirely false grounds, subject him to a battery of psychological, emotional and physical tests, and determine the exact formula for the return to normality?

After a brief fiddle with the ethical framework I make him an appointment. Notso turns out to be pleasant and communicative. He does not have dreadlocks down to his knees or tattoos on every inch of skin, and nothing obvious is pierced. In Essex this is, in itself, pathological for a teenager so I question him in depth, HAD scoring him within an inch of his life. He answers well.

There are no mood enhancing substances involved. He has ambitions. Friends. He feels a bit knackered sometimes, and doesn't like spiders, but otherwise he seems the teenaged, male version of myself. He can even see why a woman might want to climb a tree after particularly torrid surgery. I feel this constitutes more than normality. Actually I want to adopt him.

Mrs Ambitious expects at least a referral for a second opinion. As she says, my opinion assumes I know what normal is. So after a confidentiality-hampered attempt to tell her to butt out, a letter to the Chronic Fatigue Syndrome service ensues.

A little while later when Notso has been diagnosed with CFS I fall asleep on my desk between piles of quality framework data and a leaflet on topical vaginal gels. The nurse wakes me just before evening surgery, and I pick the chocolate off my eyelids. Don't worry, she says, you're just tired. I expect it's normal.

But we doctors are wary of such expectations. What is normal? I ask with my new objectivity. I get her to check my thyroid. Hope and expectation. My potential for greatness on the line.

Sadly the results are normal. This, it appears, is it.

Dr Selby is a GP from Suffolk. Email her at GPcolumnists@haymarket.com